Best lyrics for a country song ever—and they are for the opening to adultswim’s “Squidbillies”.
Seems every single band that ever formed, performed, and either dissolved or are still together have recorded a version of this song. I believe it should be required to do cover this song. If you want to record music, first let’s see how you handle this one:
My dreams are all dead and buried.
Sometimes I wish the sun would just explode.
When God comes and calls me to His kingdom,
I’ll take out all you sons of bitches when I go!
The song has other verses but while they veer off into campy redneck humor, this first verse excised from the rest makes a really short, wonderfully bitter and hate filled final statement to the world and a warning of vengeance. It is redneck gold. I’ve interacted with people who really feel this way. I love it because it’s extreme, it’s a creepy “goodbye cruel world from someone so btter, that when they die, they want to kill everyone else in a last act of vengeful violence. There’s lonliness, loss, hate, sorrow, and that warning.
Spiderlegs will do a version as well, hopefully this weekend.
shared from March Against Monsanto.
It’s just not xmas without a dead hooker…
tour the venture compound through production art…
My Sci-Fi Armory
The Star Wars blasters (DH-17, E-11, DL-44, and Westar-34) were made and/or customized by me. I also customized that Maverick, the preferred Steam Punk Nerf Gun. The DL-44 is a converted airsoft pistol which still functions as an airsoft gun.
I feel kind of badly for these poor souls with their optimistic posts all giddy about the possibility of a Constantine TV show.
Unless you are balls deep in the new and horribly uninteresting ‘New 52’ DC Constantine comic (up to issues 6 or 7 by now)—which no one really seems to be—then, if this show somehow gets made, it won’t be about John Constantine, HELLBLAZER . It will be about John Constanteen, Heckblazer Guy. It will be about the toothless revised PG version in the new comic and in the equally abysmal Justice League, Darkly.
That’s if the damn thing gets made.
The next hurdle is who will portray him and how will he be portrayed. I’ve seen some kids holding their breaths in the vain hope that either…(I wish I could make this up, but no…)…STING (on whom JC’s physical characteristics were once based), an OK bass player but terrible actor who is also now in his late50s or early 70s; OR, the other choice people are dead set after is Paul Bettany—who would have been a wonderful choice for the HELLBLAZER John, he really would have been. John at 60 years old but well preserved, the 42 (around there) year old Bettany would have done an awesome job, being 1) a good actor, 2) British like the character he would portray, and 3) a blonde guy who physically resembles many people’s idea of HELLBLAZER John Constantine.
But that’s all moot because DC John is in his late 20s and is rather a pompous poppycock that no one (neither his fellow comic cast members nor former HELLBLAZER readers) can stand much less give a fuck about. And when I said that last part, I’m talking about the asswarts who actually own the “ConstantineUSA” franchise: Warner Bros/DC, kings of the big comic fuck up. These are the same dick blisters who cast Johnny Pneumonic as HELLBLAZER John in his first filmed adventure—a yank with dark hair and absolutely no acting skills whatsoever. See, kids, so far, there is nothing to be optimistic about regarding this TV show, if recent history is any indication. It’s a fool’s pursuit.
Here’s the part I know a tiny little bit about, having been a part of a group who tried to bring a fantastic comic property to the TV screen once in the past. NBC hasn’t even named a production company to film the series which is supposedly going to air in 2014(?!?!), though the odds-on favorites would be Dino De Laurentiis Company, Living Dead Guy Productions, and/or Gaumont International Television, all 3 of which had a hand in the success of NBC’s surprise hit, Hannibal. But at Delaurentis, it’s all Stephen King, all the time, so I wouldn’t expect them to be involved, leaving Living Dead Guy as the frontrunner, but they haven’t updated their website since April, obviously having their hands full with Hannibal. Gaumont hasn’t said anything either. So, in production terms, this showno one seems thrilled about making is already behind schedule. (And just because Goyer and Cerone have been linked to this TV show, it doesn’t mean shit. Goyer is DC’s knee-jerk “go to” writer for all their “comic-2-film” announcements). It is also telling that there has been NO NEWS since September when the ball, er, bomb was dropped. Nothing, nada, zilch, except for the occasional groggy blogger sniffing a whiff of story and reposting the same ComicVine/CBR/Variety story that was posted in September and which we’ve all read 30 times thinking something new would be revealed. No news is bad news in TV Land.
So, either it is being kept under super-secret wraps—which, I mean, Why would they do that when their success is based on building a fan base—something secrecy tends to undermine. Or, thankfully, this TV series based on a bland “for kids” (rated T+) comic featuring a once great comic book character who was revised into a boring and annoying character has been shit-canned. It really would be the best thing. We don’t need to see John Constantine watered down any more than he was in 2005 or that he is now in 2013. Let the scouse fuck rest in peace, for shit’s sake!
If I have broken anyone’s hearts,well, time to grow up, fuck scrapes! You can’t be that gurgling sticky trail dripping down mom’s thigh forever! DC is not going to do right by our John, so fuck them in their scabby little buttholes and be done! Move the fuck on! HELLBLAZER has been shown the door, god damnit! (For the record, HELLBLAZER was my favorite comic from the mid-1990s until about issue 250 when it tanked).
Psycho of Greed by Public Enemy superimposed over the face of Spiderlegs…